My husband Marshall and I have a passion for learning and growing and as a result, we often end up doing growth exercising together. I actually love when this happens because it’s an inspiration and encouragement for me to go through books, answer questions, and share our dreams together. I highly recommend trying it with your partner! Community is essential for a life well lived and that can start in your own home.
During a date night 7 years ago, we hunkered down in Panera Bread and prepared to dream big and get clarity. This may not sound thrilling to some, but it very much excites Marshall and I. I had heard about this practice from Rachel Hollis and was eager to try it out with my husband.
The exercise was super helpful in providing clarity, fun, and a meaningful way to connect with my husband. Because I found so much value in it, I thought I would share the basics with you in case you wanted to try it out!
The 10–10–1 Rule
1. Start with writing down a vision for your life 10 years from today.
Go crazy with it! Have fun! Dream BIG! Do NOT limit yourself!! And try to get incredibly specific.
What do your relationships look like? Who do you have relationships with? What does a day in your life look like? How do you feel? How do you treat others? What kind of car do you drive? Where do you live? What does your home look like? Are you married? Do you have kids? What do you do as a career? Where do you vacation? How much money do you make?
You get the point. Write as detailed as you can and don’t forget — GO BIG WITH YOUR DREAMS! Don’t hold back!
2. Take your big 10 year vision and pick your top 10 dreams.
This was quite difficult for me since I had four pages (yes…FOUR!) of dreams that all sounded exciting while I wrote them. Something that helped me narrow things down was finding commonalities between dreams and pulling the bigger picture out of them. That still didn’t narrow it down to just 10, but it did help.
You can also go through your list line by line (or sentence by sentence if you wrote it as more of a story) and put stars next to the dreams that really make your heart jump as you read them. You may end up with more than 10 dreams after the first round (like I did), so keep narrowing it down. Really consider which dreams sound more exciting and align with what you want your life to look like and who you are.
3. Pull out the #1 dream you’re going to start working on TODAY.
Once you’ve written out your final 10 dreams list, pick just ONE dream you are going to start working on TODAY. This is going to be your goal. As it goes: a dream is “an idea that you have” and a goal is “when you stop hoping for your dreams and start working towards them.”
You may feel resistant to only focusing on one goal at a time, but just remember this important quote:
If everything is important, then nothing is. — Patrick Lencioni
OOH YEAH! That hits ya, doesn’t it? It does for me!
If you try this exercise (either by yourself or with another), please share your experience and maybe even some of your dreams or your one goal.
Was the practice helpful or frustrating? Did it help you get clear on who you are and what you want your life to be? I can’t wait to encourage you on your journey towards a life you’ve always dreamed of!
Ready to get out of the fog and step into your life? Download my FREE guide: 5 Simple Habits to Break Free From Stuckness and Step Into Your God-Given Purpose and take the first step to getting clear today!